I've been changing but you'll never see me.
Sleeping is overrated.
Tried getting to bed at a decent time tonight, since I have church in the morning. That didn't happen. I even showered and got my hair all ready for tomorrow so I won't have to worry about it tomorrow, but still can't get to sleep. It's only 1:27AM but it seems like it should be later, later is when I usually go to bed. I had my lights out around 12:30ish AM. Usually I get to sleep around 3:30ish to 4AM. gah.
So, like I said, sleep is overrated.
Are you happy now?
So, I got my dress out tonight to see how it'd look with certain shoes and the necklace and such and I'm gonna be such a babe! haha I hate sounding conceided, but it looked really good. I think I'll have a fun time at homecoming next weekend. I at least am hoping so.
Anyways, figured while I'm up for a bit mineaswell update.
meh. :P
oy vey.
eohfnosgehhwuisbvieisjkds.
'nuff said.
It's 3am I must be lonely.
Homecoming with Jake next Sat. fun? Let's hope so.
People give me such a hard time about the silliest things. Honestly, why can't you let what is be what it is? It isn't anything in the first place so don't flip a lid about it.
Rock music tonight is a definate. Especially since the last few nights I've wanted to cry my eyes out. I've been good at holding it in most of the nights though.
Most.
I'm drinking Gatorade, holy crap.
I've been seriously dehydrated and not eating healthy at all. We haven't really gotten any new food here for awhile because we want to get rid of what we already have, which isn't much. But we don't want to waste anything when we're moving. or something. I dunno but it's really starting to F up my system.
Didn't go downstate for BoM day, and I didn't go to JJ today even though I was invited. I didn't call Drew back even though in his message he'd "love it if I'd give him a call back" I'm moving! What hope could there be left??? Honestly. Very anti-social the last few days, but I had no problem talking on the phone with Jake for over an hour.
I just sometimes get so tired of it all. And very tired of myself. I'm not a very entertaining person. Quite the boring one am I, that's why I don't keep friends well. I finally get it now.
Maybe tonight I'll put a movie in so when I'm laying in the dark I'll have something to keep my mind focused on other than my life and how cruddy it can be.
I also need to get my dress out and figure out what shoes for it and what not. I need to know where everything is so when I go downstate next Friday it'll be easier to pack. I'll probably be down there until Sunday so I can see Mike at church and a few others. Plus it'd be very late if I tried to get home after homecoming.
If I'm rude to you, I'm not meaning to be and not meaning for it to sound that way, it's just how it's coming out of my mouth. I'm sorry.
Night.
When the stars go blue.
I feel kinda icky today.
My nose hurts, it was kinda runny, and I'm on and off cold. Not to mention my stomach is in hate mode right now.
I need to eat healthy for awhile. I haven't in a long while. Over a week at least I believe.
Izzie gets gross smelling. I gave her a bath and madre still smells whatever it is that she smells.
I keep finding stuff missing. I don't know where they'd go or what I possibly did with them. It's kind of annoying me.
I want a new game for my lappy. I'ma search around. Mebbe get my sims back.
Heaven's gates won't open up for me and all I see is you.
The stars are beautiful tonight. They really are.
I'm gonna miss that roof.
I'm gonna miss this house.
I'm gonna miss my friends.
I've been tough through all of this. I haven't flinched once in being happy and supportive.
But tonight, tonight.
That's a different story.
But they won't know. It'd make it harder for them. I can't have that.
Last time I had a good cry: tonight.
@};-
Dance to this beat and hold a lover close.
Yay. for serious.
So lately I've been thinking tons about Nick, who moved away to Wyoming and I hadn't talked to in forever and didn't have his number. I even looked up him and his siblings on myspace today and found his brother who was a good buddy of mine as well. Then my phone went off and it was Nick. I was soo happy you have no idea. At first he asked if I was drunk because I was laughing so much. I wasn't drunk I was just that happy to hear from him. I now have his number so I can call him anytime and it just made my day.
It was good for me and I think exactly what I needed because lately I've just felt kinda crappy. I'd just be sad for no reason and sore and lazy and I'm not doing anything. I like to be active. It keeps me happy. It was good to take Izzie for walks twice today, not long ones but it still happened and hasn't in a long time.
So, updates on G-pa and house hunting.
G-pa:
Still in the hospital, had surgury in a artery that was 90% blocked and then he was supposed to get out yesterday when he started throwing up a lot and there was blood in it. They sent a scope down today and found his esophagus and it was all tore up so I don't know what they're gonna do now. the air that was puffing outta the scope was enough to make it start bleeding. They think it's from acid reflex or something.
House hunting:
No longer! We officially have a house now we just need to get rid of this one and pack and get over there. There are a few peoples living there still I think but they should be out pretty soon, they didn't have much left in the house. :D:D:D It has a inground heated pool and an acre of land. I like it from what I've seen so far. I saw it once and that was when parents were going to sign the papers.
Now I'm just staying at home keeping my room clean and chillaxin' with madre and puppy-dawg. It's not that bad. I'm getting bored and going crazy, but I'm back to normal for now. :-)
ciao!
♥
Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
The title is off of a new shirt I own...hehe.
Anyways, still looking for a house, my Grandpa has been in the hospital for a week now and we just found out he's not letting the doctors do anything pretty much so we can't find out if he needs surgury or where he's bleeding from or anything, and so my padre has been there stressing out because we thought the Doctors were pathetic morons and didn't know how to do anything. Now we know that my G-pa just wants to go home and doesn't care if he's dying. He's been seeing things and hearing things and it's kinda scary. The other day he asked Dad when I Started high school back up.
Puppy mighta done something to her foot, not sure but she's been favoring the other back leg more then the other. She is due for shots and crud anyways so I need to see when I have a day I'll actually be home to take her in...there will go more of my money :P
When I'm getting bored with my hair I'm making it curly.
Other than that, I've been going back and forth a lot, getting to know other peoples more and more and seeing a lot of my good buddys from camps and such. It's been hectic/stressful/crazy but it has at least not been that bad, usually pretty fun.
Ciao
